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Greetings from Empath 
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Joined: Fri Apr 10, 2009 9:37 pm
Posts: 22
Location: North East England
This is the story of faith, of dedication, of kindness and a hamster called Joseph Patrick. It is also rather funny and goes to show that we never know quite what will happen at a busy animal sanctuary.
It started (as they all do) with a frantic phone call. Could we take a friendly hamster? They will bring all his food and equipment too. I said yes, we have room for a hamster, and I asked if the caller knew where to bring him.
“Oh, yes”, she said. “It will take one hour and three minutes to get to you, so I will be with you at 3 minutes past 1, tomorrow afternoon.” Very precise eh? I should have realised that this one was going to take us to the Twilight Zone – especially when I took the telephone number and found it ended with 666.
Joseph Patrick duly arrived the following afternoon – but the driver had become slightly lost, and had gone through 4 more villages before they thought to phone us and admit they’d got lost. When they finally got to me (half an hour late, and very flustered), and started bringing out the “equipment” which came with the hamster, things really started getting weird.
For a start they were nuns. Sister Tinkler who was small, timid and had a tiny squeaky voice, and her Mother Superior who was built like a brick sh*t house and bore a striking resemblance to Hitler. They had brought 4 binbags full of “equipment” for this single male hamster. The owner, I was told, was a former nun, who “ran of screaming into the night” and had never returned for her hamster.
They left Joseph Patrick in my tender Odinist hands, and went on their way rejoicing, back to their convent. But there were some weird things in those binbags. For a start, there were the notebooks – 2 tiny hamster-sized notebooks, one of which bore the legend “Christmas Gnawtivity” on it’s cover. There was 10 bags of fluffy bedding, sawdust, 5 water bottles, a grey and fawn woolly hat, (small child sized, a matching set of 2 planks of wood with holes in, a 1ml syringe (why?) a few bags of food and treats, a tea towel (?) and (most scary) a set of 4 multicoloured flannel face cloths. Oh and 4 cages.
Now, I ask you friends... Why would 1 small hamster NEED 4 cages? And I daren’t ask about the face cloths.

Mon Apr 20, 2009 10:39 pm
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Joined: Wed Feb 04, 2009 12:32 pm
Posts: 97
Location: England
Perhaps you should count yourself lucky that Richard Gere wasn't in the bib bag !! :D

Tue Apr 21, 2009 12:42 pm
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